– International Couple Anecdote –
Japanese wife: Ms A | Singaporean husband: Mr Y

 

Q: How long have you been married?
結婚何年目ですか?
A: We are in our 8th year of marriage.
8年目です。
 
Please tell us your age at the time of marriage.
結婚した当時の年齢を教えてください。
Ms A: 27 years old. 妻Sさん:27歳。
Mr D: 33 years old. 夫Dさん:33歳。
 
Where did you meet your partner?
出会った場所は?
At the company we worked in, in Japan.
会社(日本)。
 
Where did you go for your first date?
初デートの場所は?
A bar nearby our office.
会社近くのバー。
 
How long were you two in a relationship before marriage?
交際期間はどのくらいでしたか?
About a year.
1年くらい。
 
What did he say when he proposed to you?
ずばり!プロポーズの言葉は?
“Would you marry me?” (in a small voice)
結婚してくれる?(弱気めに)
 
Where did you have your wedding ceremony? And what kind of ceremony did you have?
結婚式はどこで?何式で行いましたか?
We had our ROM ceremony (where we signed in front of an official witness) at a hotel in Sentosa, followed by a simple dinner.
セントーサのホテルで証人の前でサインをする儀式と食事だけの簡単なもので済ませました。
 
Where did you go for your honeymoon?
ハネムーンはどこへ?
The Maldives.
モルディブ。
 
What do you like most about your partner?
相手の一番好きなところは?
How he is very considerate of me.
よく気を使ってくれる。
 
Is there anything you would like your partner to change about themselves?
相手になおしてほしいところはありますか?
There are times when he talks too much about their work that I get tired from listening.
仕事の話が長くてちょっと聞くのが疲れる時がある。
 
What do you think is the best part of Japan?
日本のいいところはどこだと思いますか?
The different colours of nature and the various foods of the four seasons.
四季折々の景色、旬の食べ物。
 
What about the best part of Singapore?
シンガポールのいいところはどこだと思いますか?
Since it’s always summer here, it’s unexpectedly quite casual and easygoing because we don’t need to change clothes with the seasons.
ずっと夏だから衣替えがなくどこでも割とカジュアルで楽ちん。
 
What do you think are the best parts of International marriage?
国際結婚のいいところはどこだと思いますか?
Gaining a deeper understanding of a different culture. Like the historical immigrant ancestry of the Chinese people here, their food culture and religion, as well as their ways of thinking – it’s all very fascinating.
異文化を深く知ることができる点中華系移民の歴史背景、食文化、宗教や物の考え方、なかなか興味深いです。
 
What about the hardest part of International marriage?
国際結婚の大変なところはどこだと思いますか?
The friction between our value systems might be tougher than that of a couple coming from the same culture. For example, with Singaporean Chinese men in particular, many of them consider it a virtue to treasure their mother. Hence, the mother-in-law can at times hold outsize power within the family, and try to control or influence their daughter-in-law and grandchildren.
価値観を擦り寄せるのが同じ文化の人同士のカップルより大変かもしれない。例えば架橋は母親を大事にするのが徳と考えている男性が多く家族の中で姑の権力が大きく、嫁と孫を支配したがる。
 
What language do you use to communicate with each other?
普段の会話は何語ですか?
Japanese and English.
日本語と英語です。
 
Do you have any memorable episodes where you experienced culture shock?
カルチャーショックだったエピソードはありますか?
My husband can be quite a stickler for cleanliness, and he believes in showering before sitting on the bed. So it was quite a shock to him when I wanted to just roll around on the bed without showering. He also hates carpets because he believes it would gather dust.
綺麗好きでシャワーを浴びないとベットには座ることすら出来ない事。シャワーしないでゴロゴロしたい時は直に床に寝ててビックリ。絨毯とか埃になるから嫌いだそうです。
 
What is the best memory or episode that you have had together as a couple?
二人の思い出に残るエピソードを教えてください。
The sea at the Maldives. We went snorkeling, and I was especially moved when we swam with big sharks and turtles.
モルディブの海。スノーケルで、大きなサメや亀と一緒に泳げて感動しました。
 
Of all that your partner has done for you, what has made you the happiest?
相手にしてもらってうれしかったことはなんですか?
Maybe when he made me the beneficiary of his life insurance policy? (laughs).
生命保険への加入ですかね。(笑)
 

 

Please give some advice to those who are considering an international marriage.
国際結婚を考えている方へメッセージ。

Singaporean men seem to be quite shy yet sincere, on overall. For working men, many often do not work overtime or go out after work, and instead head straight home and share the burden of child-rearing with their partners. It’s also common for both parents to be working while bringing up their children together, so it’s perfect for those who wish to continue working after marriage. Just that, for Japanese brides who might be frustrated with over-interference from their mothers-in-law, it would be best to keep some distance from their partners’ family homes.
シンガポール男性は結構シャイで一途な人が多いかなと思います。働き方についても、残業は殆どせずに寄り道しないで帰ってきて子供の世話の分担もしてくれる人が多いし共働きへの理解もすごくあるので子育てしながら働きたい人にはうってつけ。ただ、姑の過干渉で悩む日本人嫁としては、旦那さんの実家とはなるべく距離を置くが吉だとおもいます。